Seeing Baby

Hi, Little-One.

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This entire time I’ve been aware of you, you haven’t quite seemed real. I feel like I’m making it up. Playing a joke on myself. That was until I saw you moving around today with your little feet curled up to your belly and crossed, like you were cozy in there. I couldn’t believe you could move. Barely human and you already moved not too different from me. And your sweet little heartbeat - 155 bpm as Nathan memorized and said all of his music would now match. You already have miniature facial features. I can’t believe you are forming inside of me. It is the craziest experience. So often I feel like the growth of something in life depends on over-extending myself and putting in my best effort or all will fail and fall apart. This feels like the first time something magical and perfect is happening without my input at all. My body just knows what to do. This is profound to me. It makes me feel like I am a part of something extraordinary and I just get to watch it unfold around me. I feel safe. Thank you for already changing me so much. For softening me, helping me get out of my head, and for showing me that life is so special. So often I feel alone in life , separate and scared to exist but having you with me everywhere feels like the biggest gift. My body feels like a home rather than a stranger and beautifully, it’s for both of us.

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